Sex после родов. Есть нюансы
Sex, как известно, неотъемлемая часть жизни большинства взрослых людей. И молодые мамы не являются исключением. Но все же во время беременности половая жизнь женщины несколько меняется.
Svetlana Babylonskaya Obstetrician-gynecologist, Ph.D. honey. in the Department of Clinical Pharmacology, MGMSU
Mom and the baby were discharged from the hospital. The child peacefully snuffles in the crib, mum and dad overwhelm the parents' feelings. But after the woman and the man became parents, they did not cease to be spouses. How will the events unfold on the marriage bed after such a significant change in the family, like the birth of a child?
During the long 9 months of pregnancy and during labor, significant changes occur in the woman's body, including her genitals. Of course, after giving birth, the body does not immediately return to the "pre-pregnancy" state. So, during pregnancy, the size of the uterus increases significantly, during the delivery vary the size of the cervix, the vagina. Quite often, women also face such a complication of labor, such as ruptures or a cut of the perineum, a rupture of the walls of the vagina. During the first week of the postpartum period, the mass of the uterus is reduced by half, then the reverse development (involution) occurs somewhat more slowly. Immediately after birth, the uterus's bottom is located about 4 cm below the navel, and on the 4th day after birth - half the distance between the umbilicus and the pubic region. On the 8th-9th day, it is determined at the pubic level or 2 cm above it. On average, for every day the bottom of the uterus drops by 2 cm. By the 6th-8th week after the birth, the reverse development of the uterus ceases. Together with the uterus "pre-pregnant" the size is acquired and its neck.
The process of reverse development of the muscles of the vagina depends on the tone of these muscles; restoration of the former size of the vagina can be compared with the process of "cleaning the stomach" after childbirth. If the abdominal muscles were in good shape before delivery, during the pregnancy the woman did not forget about charging, then the figure quickly acquires the old forms after childbirth. Approximately the same situation with the muscles of the vagina: if you regularly perform exercises for the muscles of the vagina and perineum, then after childbirth, they will quickly recover. But in either case, the role is played by genetic factors, as well as by age (the younger the woman, the faster and more fully restored muscles).
Patients who underwent a planned operation of cesarean section, there are no changes from the side of the vaginal walls, but in all the women without exception (and after spontaneous childbirth and after cesarean section), the wound surface remains in the uterus after separation of the aftertaste. Along with the above anatomical features of the postpartum period, this increases the likelihood of various infectious agents entering the uterus. In addition, during the first 6-8 weeks after delivery, vaginal discharge resembles a copious menses, the so-called lochia, which is, in fact, a wound secret; they cease with the final healing of the inner surface of the uterus. The total volume of vaginal secretions in 6-8 weeks is 500-1500 g. In the first days, the Lochians have a bloody character, gradually their color changes from red to reddish-brown, brownish; by the 4th week of excretion they almost cease and soon disappear altogether.
All these transformations in the body of a woman in the postpartum period serve as an excuse for saying that vaginal intercourse during the first 1.5-2 months after birth and cesarean section surgery is completely excluded. Such a ban is the prevention of postpartum inflammatory changes, as well as late postpartum hemorrhages.
So, 6-8 weeks after the birth, you should visit the gynecologist's reception, which will give the go-ahead for the resumption of intimate relationships. With the resumption of sexual activity after childbirth, a woman may face the following problems.
In many women, even a few months after childbirth, dryness in the vagina is preserved, which is due to the peculiarities of the restoration of the hormonal background. This phenomenon can be caused by the discomfort and even soreness of the sexual act for the woman. In this case, in advance it is necessary to stock up a special lubricant, which can be bought in any pharmacy.
If the crotch was stitched, then in the seam area pain may occur. This is due to the fact that they end up with nerve endings. This phenomenon is observed during the healing of any seam on any part of the body - including during the healing of the suture in the anterior abdominal wall after a caesarean section. To avoid or eliminate painful sensations in the seam area, you need to choose a pose at which the scar is minimal pressure. If a woman underwent a caesarean section operation, then this can be any position in which the woman is on top; if it is a seam on the crotch, it is probably convenient to choose a pose on the side. Over time, unpleasant sensations in the area of the seam will pass. To make scarring less painful and sensitive, you can use medication, the action of which is aimed at resorption of scars (CONTRACTBUX, SALKOSERIL, etc.).
Some couples note that after the birth, the ratio of the size of the vagina and penis varies. This problem is temporary and must be understood with the understanding of the man. To restore the vaginal tone women need to do special gymnastics. And to do such exercises it is desirable both during pregnancy, and immediately after childbirth. Exercises are the slow tension of the muscles of the perineum and buttocks. The sensation should be as if you need to restrain the urge to urinate. The voltage should rise slowly, for 5 seconds, then it follows the same slow, within 5 seconds, relaxation. Due to this gymnastics the vaginal walls will become more elastic, blood circulation in the genital organs will improve. This gymnastics after childbirth can be done and at seams on a perineum.
No less attention than physiological changes in the postpartum period, deserve a psychological change, occurring not only in the minds of women, but also in the family as a whole. A man and a woman perceive each other not only as spouses, but also as parents, they have new functions and responsibilities.
Feelings that a woman can experience
- After childbirth due to a sharp change in the hormonal background, a woman may be prone to frequent mood swings. The extreme negative manifestation of changes in the emotional sphere is postnatal depression.
- Most women, especially if they have had trauma to the birth canal, have a fear of having sex. This is a fear of pain and anxiety about the integrity of the sutures in the vagina.
- All thoughts of a woman are taken by a child. Mom seems that her state of "eternal fear for the child" is absolutely not supported by her husband. A sense of loneliness, isolation can form. In addition, the young mother is afraid to wake the child, thinking that the baby is about to wake up and cry, even if the baby is sleeping separately - in the nursery.
- After giving birth, a woman can feel unattractive, which reduces her self-esteem, does not contribute to the resumption of sexual desire.
- One of the main factors that reduce sexual desire is fatigue, which all women without exception give birth to. Fatigue often gives rise to irritability.
Feelings that a man can experience
- A man wants to satisfy his physiological needs for sexual intercourse, but he can also fear, because he is afraid to cause pain to his wife.
- Often men feel jealous of the baby. If the wife does not allow to participate in the care of the child, the man can also feel loneliness, a lack of warmth and caresses, which he is accustomed to receiving from his wife.
How to solve problems
Do not overshadow the family relationship by mutual reproaches and resentments. Give the father the opportunity to join in caring for the child, give him more independence in this.
Try to be together more often, in addition to common household affairs and caring for the baby, find daily at least 10-15 minutes, which you can devote to each other (for example, at dinner). A truly loving man will never force a woman, inciting her to sex after giving birth, until she herself is ready for it. A really loving woman will not calculate how many hours a week she slept and how much - her husband, will try to understand all his desires and be able to give him pleasure. By the way, a couple practicing oral-genital contacts can resume them already in the very near future after childbirth.
Often a woman after childbirth wants to not have sex, and caresses, and this is quite normal. A woman should feel the love of her husband not only in bed, but also outside her. This is a necessary part of the relationship. A man should not be embarrassed to show his affectionate attitude towards his wife - for example, patting her on the head or kissing her forehead or neck, since this does not detract from his masculine dignity, but on the contrary - raises him in female eyes.
Remember that sex is not a service to a partner, but what you need both, your family, and be willing to take only positive emotions out of it. It is important for a woman to remember that her current figure is the "costs" of a huge deal done and that all negative changes are temporary. Therefore, let your partner decide for himself how attractive you are.
To begin a sexual life after sorts it is necessary as well as after acquaintance: gradually, slowly recognizing each other. Many women are concerned about the possibility of milk from the breast during sexual intercourse. Act in this situation is necessary slowly, while retaining some sense of humor. It is best to choose the time one hour after feeding the baby, then the possibility of milk from the breast is the smallest, but if this still can not be avoided, you should have a towel handy at hand so that your sexual intercourse does not stop "at the most interesting place."
После родов женщине снова необходимы романтика и нежность, а мужчине — заигрывания и выраженное словами желание женщины. Супругам очень важно понимать, что рождение ребенка не означает того, что в их жизни больше нет места влюбленности. Более того, влюбленность между супругами должна культивироваться ими — это важно не только для них самих, но и для малыша, который вырастет и будет строить свою семейную жизнь по той же схеме, что и его родители. Кроме всего прочего, любящие друг друга счастливые родители могут дать ребенку гораздо больше, чем родители обиженные и постоянно недовольные друг другом. Sex после родов возвращается не сразу, он может быть не настолько ярким и темпераментным, как до беременности, но значительно более глубоким, прочувствованным и нежным. Даже самый нежный отец не захочет забывать о том, что мать его ребенка — это еще и его жена. Помните, что трудности, возникающие сейчас в ваших взаимоотношениях, преодолимы, и после рождения ребенка ваши супружеские отношения наполнятся новым содержанием. Нужно сказать еще и о том, что многие женщины после родов не испытывают никаких проблем с сексом — даже, наоборот, говорят о том, что влечение к мужу стало сильнее и оргазм — ярче.
Contraception after childbirth
Despite breastfeeding, 1.5-2 months after the birth, it is possible to resume the operation of the ovaries, which will result in ovulation - the release of the ovum from the ovary and fertilization may occur. To insure yourself against unwanted pregnancy, it is reasonable to use contraceptives since the resumption of sexual activity.
Barrier methods. Most often use condoms, diaphragms, cervical caps. These funds do not affect the process of breastfeeding and the state of the child.
Hormonal contraception. A breastfeeding mother should not use a combination birth control pills (COC), which she may have used before birth. Prohibited emergency contraception with hormonal tablets containing a large number of progestins (PIC-TINOR). You can use mini-saws, injectable contraceptives (injections), remedies implanted under the skin (all these drugs contain gestagens, which enter the woman's body in small amounts). In this case, together with the mother's milk, the child still receives the minimum amount of hormones, but they do not have any harmful effect. These funds do not reduce the amount of milk - even, on the contrary, increase it. These funds can be used from the b-th week after childbirth.
Intrauterine devices (spiral). They do not affect the formation of milk. The introduction of intrauterine devices after 6 weeks after childbirth after a proper examination is a fairly safe procedure.
Surgical sterilization - ligation of the fallopian tubes. It is often performed during a caesarean section. Recommended for women over 35 years of age and / or with two or more children.
Attention! To select the method of contraception, you need to see a doctor.